Navigating Holiday Blues: Tips to Find Joy and Beat Stress
Written by: Becca Blumer
‘Tis the season for gatherings with friends and family, spreading love, exchanging gifts, eating big meals, sharing a sweet treat, and so much more. The holidays can be a time of great joy and excitement. But, for some, it can also be a time of hardship, bad memories, melancholy, and loneliness. I’m fortunate to have friends and family to spend the time with. But that doesn’t exempt me from feeling lonely or stressed this time of year. So let’s talk about some ways to combat those less-than-desirable feelings during this season.
Although I do have people to spend time with, for me the holidays are often a reminder of the fact that I am super-duper SINGLE! As a single lady, I am often the third or fifth (or even seventh) wheel. Mostly I don’t mind, but sometimes it gets the better of me. And, like so many, I have my own mental health battles. So I find this time of year especially challenging from that perspective—not to mention it can be an extremely stressful time of year personally, professionally and financially. Through the years, I’ve picked up some coping techniques to help make me feel better, more in control, and even more productive. Maybe these tips and tricks can help you, too.
A disclaimer: I am not an expert, I am not a doctor, and I am not YOU. I am just a woman trying to remind myself every day that I am worthy, and I do, in fact, rock! So, here we go:
Make the Most of Flying Solo
If you’re single and feeling a bit lonely, when you’re at holiday parties attended mostly by couples, or you’re surrounded by smooching when the ball drops on New Years Eve, it can be a real downer. Let’s be honest… being single on the holidays can seriously SUCK! So, what can you single folks do? I’ll be the first to tell you… GO OUT ANYWAY! Go to that fancy dinner with your couple friends, head to the holiday party, do all the things! There is no rule book that says you can’t enjoy the same things just because you don’t have someone to enjoy them with. And yes, sometimes it is hard to put yourself in that headspace and not be bummed that you aren’t sharing with another person. But the first step is trying and enjoying your own company first and foremost.
Remember, Thoughtful Gifts Can be Priceless!
Maybe you, like me, aren’t flush with cash all the time. I also suffer from loving to give gifts, so naturally the holidays can stretch my wallet pretty thin. My tip for this is one that you’ve heard before, but I’ll say it again to refresh your memory. It is not the price of the gift that matters, it is the thought that matters. Some of the best gifts I have ever given friends or family have cost me zero dollars. That’s right… ZERO. For friend’s with kids, I’ve given them a free night of babysitting. For others, I’ve planned days of low cost activities or cooked a meal. One of the best gifts I ever got my father (and this is according to him) literally cost me a single dollar. All of these gifts were full of thought and care, and that is the real gift. Now more than ever, people just want to be thought of and cared for. So if you’re looking at your bank account wondering how you’re going to give a gift to everyone on your list, remember that sometimes it's the costless gift that is the most valuable.
Beat the Seasonal Gloom
It’s no secret that the weather changing and the lack of sunshine can make you feel a little blah. Every year, I feel the seasonal blues a bit more. More so than the cold, the lack of sun and it getting dark so early are what I really struggle with. Some people find that a happy light helps (one that is meant to replicate sunlight), and getting your blood pumping with some physical activity is always a great idea (no matter the time of year). But something I have found that makes me feel less gloomy is making my space, whether that's my living space or even my workspace, cozy and inviting. When it is gray and gross outside, the last thing I want to do is go for a walk. And it is often dark by the time I’m able to get out and about! But if I’m going to stay inside, why not jazz it up? I love to light a candle, put on some good music, make myself some tea or hot cocoa, and enjoy some ME time! Maybe that’s reading a book, cooking a new recipe, or taking a luxurious bath or hot shower. Whatever makes you feel soothed, and smiley is the thing to do!
Boost Your Holiday Productivity
How about being productive? Time seems to fly this time of year, and we all get busy. Maybe you’re like me and get a little bit of productivity guilt. While I’ll be the first to tell you that isn’t a good thing, I’ll also be the first to admit that I am someone who battles that. So what can we do when our schedule is jammed-packed? Pick one thing a day. The thing can be small, it could even be just the start of something, but pick something from your list of TO DOs, and dive in. This way, no matter what, you can say you accomplished one thing, and that feeling can be powerful! This was some of the best advice I ever received at a time I was feeling particularly low. Back then, my one thing was brushing my teeth. But the next day, I brushed my teeth, and took a shower. And the next day I brushed my teeth, showered, and did the dishes. Productivity builds upon itself, and when you’re feeling low, the ability to say to yourself ‘well I at least did this today’ can make a world of difference.
I hope that these tips can maybe change up how you feel during the holidays and bring back some of the merriment! And if you’re looking for someone to go to that fancy dinner with, or any other experience, send me an invite! Because after all, another great way to fight the blues, is making a new friend!
Have other ideas you’d like to share with the community? Send those my way too! And let’s be a community that cares for one another, and rocks together!